As Charis & Duffy transfer their adopted embryos TODAY, they reflect, “Some of our greatest blessings have been born from our greatest sorrows. Had we not stepped beyond our fears to embrace embryo adoption, we would have foregone so much joy in raising our children and loving our donor families.”
What led you to embryo adoption?
After many years of infertility and unsuccessful fertility treatments our best guess at a diagnosis was premature diminished ovarian reserve (DOR). When we first heard about embryo adoption, Charis was intrigued but Duffy was reluctant. He was thrilled with the domestic adoption we had just completed for our first daughter and saw no need to change paths. After much prayer and consideration, the perfect donor family compelled us to move forward with a transfer of two embryos, resulting in the birth of our second daughter. Hoping to grow our family again, we were blessed to match on NRFA.org and are scheduled for a frozen embryo transfer (FET) on February 3, 2015.
How long had your family been looking for embryos or seeking an adoption prior to registering on NRFA.org?
We had been registered with another web based matching service for about 10 months with no success or contact from donors.
How long was it before you were contacted by a donor on NRFA.org?
We were contacted by two donor families within four months. We were ecstatic!
What special connections or commonalities have you noticed between your family and your donor’s family?
They are everything we prayed for in a donor family. It was surreal to get to know them and realize how perfectly we were matched for each other. We had the same views on religion, family values, and both desired an open adoption relationship. They are even located in a city that we always visit once a year, and the timing worked out so that we got to meet them before finalizing the match.
Describe how the process of matching, legal contract, and medically planning has gone. (Easier than you expected, less/more work than expected, easy/stressful, etc)
The process was much easier than I expected. The embryos had already been donated to a nationally recognized embryo donation clinic in Tennessee, so I worried that we would have trouble getting them released. It was a breeze. The clinic was delightful to work with and worked quickly to get our embryos shipped to us.
When do you plan to do (or when did you do) a transfer?
February 3, 2015! We are so excited!
What has been the biggest surprise to you throughout this process?
There have been moments of fear, hesitation, sorrow, excitement, relief, and joy on this journey…but the trump card was always “love”. Love for our potential children, our beloved donors, and our Lord who led us (and carried us) every step of the way. I would encourage those considering embryo adoption and donation to let “love” be their trump card as well. Some of our greatest blessings have been born from our greatest sorrows. Had we not stepped beyond our fears to embrace embryo adoption, we would have foregone so much joy in raising our children and loving our donor families.